Dexter?

We were toned out for a 35 year old male with cuts to his hands.

As we pulled up to the scene just after midnight we could see our patient leaning on the back of a car holding a towel on his hand. There was also a small knot of people on the sidewalk looking on.

Approaching the man I could tell he was inebriated. I stayed a couple feet back (because I don't trust drunk people) and asked what was going on. The man explained that he had been drinking and got angry. Not angry at anything in particular but just angry. In his fit of rage he decided he would take out his frustrations by hitting the bedroom window.

I then had the man remove the towel. His hand was covered in dried blood and there was a little but of fresh blood still dripping from his pinky. Wanting to know how much blood he had lost I did a quick walk through of the house. The entire time the man's uncle mumbled and complained about how his nephew was a drunk and never did anything. Inside the scene appeared to be something that Dexter would love. The guy had, after discovering that his finger was bleeding, decided to walk through the entire house shaking his hand essentially throwing blood on the floor, walls and ceiling in each room.

Outside the ambulance and PD had arrived. With the help of a garden hose the medic had washed off the hand to find that the patient had a decent size cut to his pinky but that was it. After a quick bandage the patient refused transport. We explained that he still needed stitches. The drunk said that he would drive himself. We quickly pointed out that he was too intoxicated to drive. Evidently still not wanting to go to the hospital the drunk turned to the closest cop and pointed at him saying, "I'll get a ride from him."

Without missing a beat the officer grabbed the outstretched hand, twisted it behind the back of the belligerent man and cuffed him. That pretty much ended my call.

Assault With Bodily Fluids

I am usually a very cool customer when it comes to dealing with patients. Even the ones that are really annoying and/or offensive. But there are times when my limits are stretched.

Or both

We were called to one of our local dive bars for a 'man down.' As we pulled up we could see that PD was there talking to a man sitting on the sidewalk. There was blood all over the concrete.

My patient was walking out of the bar and was supposedly hit in the back of the head by someone with something. He then fell to the ground and hit his head causing a 4 inch laceration. Being a head wound there was quite a bit of blood.

I knelt down next to my patient and inspected his head wound while holding his head and neck still. The bleeding had mostly stopped. I asked my engineer to bandage it up and I started my assessment to see if I could clear c-spine. I asked my patient if he had any pain in his head or neck? He responded by swearing at me and telling me that he was bleeding.

No ****ing duh Sherlock.

I tried again and got the same response. After a couple of other questions to determine if he was alert and oriented (he was) I asked him how many drinks he had had. In response he reached his hand up to his head, covered his hand in blood and proceeded to wipe on my turnouts.

At that point I was done. I asked my captain to throw a c collar on the guy. By this time AMR was pulling up. I walked over and gave them a rundown on the call. Basically I told them that the....patient was hit and the head, was bleeding, was alert and oriented and being a prick. Since he didn't want to answer questions he was going to have to be placed on a backboard. Just precautionary. Usually I don't like placing people on a board because it's really uncomfortable, even painful. This time I was happy to do it.

While I was talking to the AMR guys I could hear my captain yelling at the patient not to grab him. At least the drunk wasn't just being difficult with me.

While strapping him to the board the pain in the caboose kept trying to sit up and yell that we should be trying to find the guy that hit him. We assured him the the police were doing just that. We finally got him good and strapped down and loaded in the ambulance. The last thing I heard from him was him yelling obscenities at the medic in the back of the ambulance.

Stupid patients.

Embarrassing Beat Down

The tones jolted me awake again. It was just after 4 in the morning, about 2 hours after our last call. Whenever I get these calls I always hope it's at least for something legit. I hate getting up for BS (so does everyone in this profession).

Dispatch informed us that we were responding for an assault victim and that PD was already on scene. Coming around the corner in the quiet residential neighborhood we spotted several police cruisers. We were in the right spot.

My engineer pulled past the house, parked the rig and shut off the engine. There's no need to wake up everyone with our big diesel motor. We could hear yelling from inside the house. The officer at the door told us that the step-father and step-son had been drinking (shocker) and there had been an altercation. One look at the 19 year old kid and it was easy to see who had won that fight. He already had a big black eye, swollen face, bloody nose and cut lip. He may have been missing a tooth as well but I couldn't be sure.

My patient quickly refused to service. He told me rather indignantly that he was an EMT and he knew I couldn't touch him. He then tried to give me the silent treatment. That was until I quietly told him that if he refused to answer my questions I would have to assume that he was mentally impaired. And if I assumed that he would end up naked on a backboard with a C collar on and some IV's in his arms.

The kid became almost nice to me after that but he kept yelling at and antagonizing the cops. After refusing to be treated again he started arguing with one of the officers. Just then the on duty sergeant came in. After surveying the situation for a second he ask the other officers to place the young man under arrest. That didn't sit too well with the teen and he decided to fight. Alcohol made him think he could beat down his mom's new husband and then it made him think he could defeat several officers. He was sadly (for him) mistaken.

It must be a little embarrassing to wake up in jail having lost not one, but two fights in the previous night.