"Stupid Is As Stupid Does"

It wasn't even a holiday weekend which made the presence of a DUI checkpoint down the street a surprise. I'm sure it was more of a surprise to the drunk drivers trying to make it home. But this post is not about them. It's about another driver that made some very poor choices both before and after encountering the DUI checkpoint.

This man had chosen, earlier in the day, to steal a Land Rover. Stupid move #1.

As he rounded the corner and the flashing red and blue lights came into view I'm sure his adrenaline started to kick in. He then decided to do what a lot of people trying to avoid the law do when presented with a checkpoint, turn into a parking lot and go another direction. Unfortunately for him the police know this too. So when they see someone turning last minute it guarantees that a motorcycle unit will quickly follow to investigate.

When the officer tried to pull him over the driver hit the accelerator. Stupid move #2.

A short chase later (about 2 blocks) the thief wrecked and then tried to flee on foot. Stupid move #3.

The perpetrator, who happened to not be in great running condition, then decided that his chances of escape were better if he used his physical prowess to climb a fence. Stupid move #4.

The officers (now there were a lot of them....I have to assume that a chase is to a cop what a structure fire is to a firefighter) caught up to the bad guy at this point and pulled him off the fence. Now seeing as he was only outnumbered by guys with batons and guns and since our delinquent was obviously in great physical shape  I can understand why he decided to attempt to fight off said officers. Stupid move #5

This is about the time that we were toned out. As we approached the scene we could see that several PD units had half of the major street blocked and the entire side street was cordoned off with yellow police tape. An officer led me to the back of one of the patrol cars while explaining the situation to me.

My patient was very upset and was yelling quite a bit. Mostly he was cussing out and cursing the deputies that caught him. He was mostly cooperative but every couple of minutes he would go back on a tirade about police brutality. His face was bruised and sore but his biggest complaint was a sharp pain in his ribs. It's possible that he could have had a fractured rib. Every time he would start screaming about the "f***ing cops" I would just reassess his painful ribs (does it still hurt when I push here?). It shut him up fairly well.

Trying to get sympathy from me for getting beat by PD when you deserved it. Stupid move #6.

The arresting officer asked if he needed to go to the hospital and I informed that I thought so. He then asked if he was going to die if he went in the patrol car. Nope! Cancel AMR.

His only good choice was the type of vehicle he chose to steal, which I'm sure happened quite by accident. This is a pursuit of a Land Rover in LA several years ago.